Sometimes poker is the most beautiful, hilarious game in the world

Ok. We're playing 1/3 NLHE at a very deepstacked underground game. 6-handed. It's 2 am. Hero has about $2500. Villain covers.

UTG opens to $15. It folds around to us. We look down at 6❤️3♠️. We've been card dead for a while, so in this spot we obviously choose to 3bet to $55 without thinking about it. Villain calls.

Flop comes A❤️K♣️5♦️. Villain checks. This smashes our range, great flop for us. Let's fucking go. We c-bet small for $30. Villain calls quickly.

The turn is 4♣️. Villain checks. We have somehow gone from fucking around with complete air to having an open-ended straight draw. Obviously we're betting again. We size up a bit. $110. Villain calls again. Alas, sometimes lighting money on fire feels good? Doesn't it? Sometimes?

The river is 2♠️. Villain checks. Did we just runner-runner drill the stone cold nuts? Yes we did. Is it difficult for us to have a three here? Yeah. Is it impossible for us to have six three here? Yes it is.

I am Phil Laak in that hand against Scott Seiver. I am become death, destroyer of worlds. I am a fucking genius.

"I'm gonna overbet here if that's ok with you?" Villain takes off his headphones. I repeat myself: "I'm gonna overbet here, do you mind?" Villain looks at me like what? I take a stack of greens and put some more greens on top of it, and then I add two red chips just to round out the color profile of the bet a bit. I push it forward calmly. Dealer breaks down the stack. $685.

Villain is in the blender. Starts muttering to himself about having ace five. What does ace five do here? This is always just KK or AK, he tells himself. I tell him I don't have any kings. I ask him if he wants to see a card. He says yeah. The dealer says I can't reveal a card. I swear to villain that I don't have any kings.

I remind villain about the conventional wisdom about big river bets in low stakes cash games: they're always nutted. I tell villain I have the nuts. I look at the board and then tell villain that I have six three. I tell him that I am not balanced in this spot. I don't have any bluffs here. It's literally just the nuts every time. I tell him to fold. I beg his ass to fold. He sighs and plops a big stack of green chips down in front of him. He called. We did it. I show him my hand. The table loses it. Villain looks like he's just returned home from World War I.

That's what this game is about. Look. Before the nerds critique this play, let me say this: It's good to know how to play correctly. It's good to study. But you have to know how to be chaotic, too. We are not machines. We are animals. Stupid fucking animals. Poker is a rich, complex, beautiful game. But it is deeply stupid and hilarious as well. Give yourself permission to do things that a solver could never begin to comprehend. We're humans. We're all going to die one day. Let yourselves live a little.