Every time the conversation with Ash on Horizon makes me want to throw my controller

Ok so my super paragon Shep would never work with or for Cerberus if we had any choice. Unfortunately the game doesn’t give you the opportunity to tell Illusive Man to F off so you can go back to the Alliance. At the same time, Shep is feeding Cerberus’ dirty secrets to Anderson and Hackett at literally every opportunity presented. But when you have that awkward conversation with Ash (I so far have never saved Alenko) it makes you bend the truth because it never lets you say “I tried to reach out but Anderson and the Alliance said you were on a top secret mission and couldn’t be reached” or “Fuck Cerberus, I hate them as much as you and am just using their resources”. I bring Garrus on the mission, never bring Miranda or Jacob since they’re decked out as Cerberus cheerleaders. I always think “hey maybe if she sees Garrus on my squad she will ease up” and it never happens. I get why she doesn’t join the mission, but it would be nice to have a paragon option of “Believe me, I wish I was just serving the Alliance and Council because I don’t trust Cerberus either.

Side note, I have always assumed that the Illusive Man was indoctrinated the whole time because his eyes look like Saren’s.