Is God involved in every mission call?

I’ll keep things short. I’m an 18 year old male. I went out to serve a mission in the north of Brazil but after 3 months of pure torture and a tornado of mental health problems I chose to come home. I can’t make you understand everything about my perspectives in a short explanation (just know I have my reasons), but I feel angry with God because I felt sure I could’ve had a full happy mission experience if He had sent me somewhere that wasn’t a 3rd world country.

Before my mission, in the MTC, and in the field I was told by leaders, family, friends, companions, and my mission president over and over and over again that my mission call was undeniably directly from God and that He had specifically directed His servants the prophets to call me there. Elder Rasband gave a talk “the divine call of a missionary” that goes into great detail emphasizing this very point.

Now that I’m home and expressing these concerns, everyone is now singing a different tune. Now I’m being told that God isn’t involved in every single mission call and some say He isn’t involved in the call process at all. If thats true, then why do apostles make the calls and not the dozens of staff working at church headquarters? I know there’s no scriptures about God being involved with mission calls, but there are conference talks about it given by the Lords chosen apostles and prophets. Id feel a lot better if Suzan from the offices randomly assigned me to Brazil instead of God himself. If he is involved in some calls but not others, than how on earth is that fair?

This is all very very confusing. A lot of answers have been flipped around for convenience sake and part of me feels like God loves His children who he sent to New Zealand and Denmark more than me who got sent to a place that eventually broke me. I know that sounds naïve of me to say, but just for arguments sake let’s say that things would have been significantly better for me there. Is prophetic revelation real? Is it only 50/50 accuracy? I just don’t know anymore

I know this is only Reddit but I’m hoping there are some good saints out there who will help me find some answers. For clarification, I’ve had multiple talks with my bishop and stake president about this.

Edit: I KNOW that all missions are hard. I KNOW that missionaries in Scandinavia and Japan have to work all day long and do this and that that all missionaries do. That was never a problem for me in Brazil and that side of missionary work felt natural to me. I wasn’t desperate to not be a missionary anymore, I was desperate to leave the country. I can’t explain without disclosing my whole medical history, but my environment in the mission field is what broke me. I know on the surface that makes me sound like a snowflake but just trust me on this, there’s a lot of untold information backing it up.