After 5 Months of Traveling, I’m Struggling with Flying

Hi everyone,

Last year, I traveled for five and a half months, taking numerous flights. Before this, I had never traveled so much in my life. While I was never passionate about flying, it had never bothered me.

This journey began when I started a digital nomad lifestyle with my girlfriend, who loves traveling and dreams of spending the whole year hopping between countries. In contrast, I’m someone who thrives with structure and routine, and I’m still unsure if the digital nomad lifestyle suits me.

At first, I was thrilled to travel. I was excited to explore new countries and didn’t mind flying. Even turbulence didn’t bother me—it sometimes amused me! But after about eight flights, things started to change. I found myself grappling with an existential crisis at 32, furthermore The constant pressure to travel, combined with spending months living with my girlfriend’s parents, took a toll on me. The breaking point came when I went to Madrid with my girlfriend and her mom. I didn’t want to go but felt pressured into it. I ended up sharing my only week off work with my mother-in-law. While she’s a wonderful person, her presence during such a personal trip made me feel even more frustrated.

For the first time, I felt anxious on a flight. The turbulence made me fearful instead of calm, and after that trip, I became hesitant to fly again. Adding to my stress, months of long working hours, continued living with my in-laws and exhaustion and confronting my existential crisis pushed me further into frustration.

When we later flew to Bangkok, I had severe anxiety before takeoff. I almost wanted to get off the plane, convinced I didn’t belong there. I took an anxiety medication, relaxed, and fortunately ended up enjoying the flight. On the return flight, I experienced anticipatory anxiety but was surprisingly calm at the airport and enjoyed another smooth flight.

In September, I took another short flight (just two hours) without any medication and felt calm and proud of myself.

But something has shifted in the past few months. After moving to a new city with my girlfriend to start a new life, I feel like I no longer want to travel. The idea of flying now fills me with intense fear, and I’m incredibly frustrated. Why did this happen? I thought I had overcome my issues with flying, yet here I am, feeling like I’ve taken a step backward.

Has anything like this ever happened to you? If so, how did you work through it?

Thanks so much for taking the time to read and share your thoughts.