Nervous about getting intimate because of spotting in the past.

I’m 29 and have been seeing someone since December and I really like where things are going. This week we did get a little intimate - fingering and hand job but we both decided to wait before taking it further. I was surprised at how large he is, length and girth wise. It’s almost as wide as my wrist and no, I’m not exaggerating.

In the past, I’ve had issues with larger partners and I spot. I’ve mentioned it to my gyn, no real reason they can find, paps are normal, no infection etc. Her best guess is just sensitive tissue/cervix and being on birth control apparently can cause it too. Who knew? I didn’t really bring this up to him yet it wasn’t really the time and I’m not going to just bring it up totally randomly. But at some point I guess I probably need to bring it up.

Does anyone else struggle with this? What are some things I can do to help? Lube is not an issue my body does a fine job of that on its own, I don’t think I’m tense, foreplay doesn’t exactly help either.

Ugh help, it’s just embarrassing.