I am Jealous of the people still playing this game, loving it, and having a blast.

I WANTED that to be me.

I pre-ordered the Deluxe edition, was so...ON FIRE for a new Bethesda game. The last one I really played being Elder Scrolls Blades 🤮, and Fallout 4. I was tired of going back to them. I wanted MORE, something FRESH.

When the game launched, I demolished it. Over 100 hours, every quest I could find, combed the systems for unique POI's. Built my dude the way I wanted.

Didn't really get into ship building, it all felt way too expensive. Never got into Settlement building in Fallout 4, and hated the idea of the bases here.

And then I beat the game. And just...that was it. The light started showing through the cracks, the magic was gone. And there was nothing tethering me to the game.

The ship stuff, again, felt tedious but cool. Bases had no point. No really cool houses or permanent places to settle. Even the WEAPONS felt bland. Which made me sad because broken apocalypse weapons from Fallout felt like they had more character.

This sub is full of a LOT of Hate, for...very valid, and good reasons. And I just wish I wasn't one of them.

But I find myself just sitting here, watching patch after patch come out for the "Least Buggy Game we've ever made." Watching as none of the fundamental issues get touched, and still waiting for new content so that I can MAYBE love the game again.

I ended up going back to Skyrim again, an almost 13 year old game, and am having more fun with it, then Starfield.

I wish I was like the rest of you, and I'm not, and it is a weight on my chest. 😓