Bad shroom trip or shroom-induced psychosis?

(I should say at the outset, I know this is probably well-tread ground on this sub but would love to hear what others make of this experience. I also fully intend to talk to my therapist about it all at my next appointment but I don’t think they really have much insight into psychedelic treatment.)

I've taken shrooms probably somewhere around ten times in the last two and a half years. Some smaller doses (.5-1g) and some on the larger end (2.5g or so). For the most part it's always been pleasant, fun, funny, and helpful. Sometimes on the larger doses after a little while the fun turns into confusion and I get restless, can't think straight, kind of just want things to end, but nothing too bad.

So last night I decided I wanted to jump into a slightly heavier dose, with the intention of laying on the couch with my eyes covered, a curated playlist, and just try to "explore inside", so to speak. I've been trying to meditate a lot more lately, understand my spiritual side better, understand myself better, and it seemed like a good time to try it. I also felt like I've done enough research on what to expect from a higher dose and this type of trip.

I set everything up at home. I'm super comfortable in my own space at home and have tripped here before and really enjoyed it. Everything was good to go.

I weighed out 3.5g and made it into a tea and drank it at 7:45pm. Went upstairs and laid down on the couch, music, blindfold and all. I'd say I probably lasted about an hour with the blindfold on, and it was nice, soothing. Felt warm and safe. Had a lot of emotions, laughing, crying, but all positive and things that I felt comfortable with.

I typically get pretty restless on shrooms so after that I took the blindfold off and just enjoyed myself around the house. Hung out in different rooms, genuinely saying out loud how much I loved the space I was in, how good I felt, I felt like I was really seeing things clearly, loving myself, understanding things. Honestly just felt totally at peace and happy. I was able to tell myself how happy I felt to just "be me", it was wonderful.

Then about two hours into the trip it took a turn for the darker. I started feeling confused. I couldn't really understand how long I'd been high, and I got the impression I'd past a point of no return by taking too many shrooms and that my brain was permanently broken. I started spiralling into thoughts that my life was going to fall apart, I'd have to leave my home and move into a facility and be taken care of the rest of my life. Then the panic turned into my heart beating out of my chest, dizziness, nausea.

I got it in my head that I was overdosing (my rational mind knows that wasn't possible on shrooms) but something felt very wrong and I was worried I was gonna die. I was having images of me becoming an overdose death. About what that would do to my family.

I couldn't really remember who I was. I tried to pull up my phone to text a friend but all the faces in my messages looked like stock photos and I didn't recognize anyone. I got it in my head that I was crazy, and I'd been crazy for a long time, and all the messages in my phone were from people who didn't want to wear from me because I'd "lost it". I started having images of understanding why people take drugs and do crazy shit because they become so detached from reality. I started feeling like I was trapped in my home and maybe dying and didn't know what to do about it.

I eventually got my sister on the phone and she just kinda sat with me and heard me out, told me I was going to be fine. But I was so far down that I couldn't really bring myself to believe her. You could have brought me the leading expert on psychedelic research and I probably would have thought they weren't real.

I managed to get a good trusted pal to come over and hang out for a bit and that helped me come back down to Earth. I was still confused but I was able to cope and be a bit more myself and calm down. By the time he left I felt mostly normal again but pretty shook.

While I still feel like this was a trip I "learned" from, the dark side of it scared the living shit out of me and I honestly just want to know how normal something like this is. If I have this kind of reaction to taking shrooms, should I be avoiding them altogether?

Or should I just make sure that next time I take a higher dose that I've got more resources to help me through it (a guide, a person nearby who's sober, etc)

Thanks so much!