[QCrit] The Ripple Effect (second posted version)

Hello again everyone. I got a lot of great feedback after I posted an earlier version of this query letter. I've completely rewritten it and would once again appreciate any feedback. I realize that the comp is not ideal; I am going to research a better comparative title over the next couple of weeks. Once again, I'd appreciate any notes.

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Dear ___,

Fifteen year-old Kali Miles is a quantum physics prodigy who would kill to trade her lab coat for a school uniform. Traversing the country and helping your parents build a time machine can be thrilling, but it’s not worth being hunted by Xavier Chase’s ruthless Spero Corporation.

Kali thinks this is simple corporate espionage; her parents know their past wrongs are catching up to them. When the time machine is finally completed, Spero dampens the Miles’ celebrations by blasting open the front door. Kali's parents help her escape through the newly opened wormhole and promise they’ll be right behind her. Instead, Kali is marooned two decades in the past, in the year 2023 at Animus High School for the Gifted. 

Kali soon spots the teenaged versions of her parents and Xavier amongst the students. As Kali wonders why she was stranded here, she sets to work rebuilding a time machine. This quickly proves too big of a job for one genius. That means making friends for the first time in her life, as well as recruiting the boy and girl who will one day abandon her.

While Kali’s crew constructs her ticket home, Xavier begins to suspect that she’s far from a typical student. If he discovers her secret before the time machine is completed, she’ll be captured and grant Xavier control of another timeline. But as Kali grows closer to her friends and uncovers the conspiracy of her family’s relationship to Spero, she can’t help but wonder one thing. Is going home worth leaving behind the family that she’s always wanted?

THE RIPPLE EFFECT is an 80,000 word young adult science fiction novel. Its commitment to loveable characters creating a found family should appeal to fans of THE EXTRAORDINARIES by T.J. Klune. I am a veterinarian in New York City, which has helped me accurately describe my novel’s scientific and medical concepts.

Thank you for your consideration,

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