"If you do shape up, I'll send you to military school!" Vernon bellowed. "Go ahead!" Harry snapped back.

"If you don't shape up, I'll send you to military school!" Vernon bellowed

"Go ahead." Harry snapped back.

"Don't even think I'm bluffing." Vernon continued.

"I hope you're not. There, I'd at least get three meals a day, clean clothes that actually fit, and sleep a minimum of a few hours a night."

Harry stared unblinking at his uncle.

"Well...well... it's only a pity they won't take you until you're eleven!"

"This one accepts from seven years old. Tution can be paid off in years of service. I've filled it out. All you need to do is sign. They'll collect me if I'm accepted." Harry's voice was icy but calm, seething with underlying hatred, but devoid of outward emotion.

"Don't push me, boy! I'll do it. I'll sign it. You just watch out."

"You're a coward. A fat wall of shame. You'd think a man as large as you would have the guts to follow through on your threat. Prove me wrong, coward. Sign it."

Vernon snatched the paper out of Harry's hand, angrily scrawling his name.

"You won't be accepted there. You need a military family to get in."

Once Harry had safely taken the document back, he replied.

"Like your father? Brigadier Vernon Bardick Dudley Dursley? He signed off at Christmas. Thinks I'm the spitting image of Colonel Cadman Dursley."