I got my best friend pregnant

A bit of a clickbait title lol, but I do view the woman I married as my best friend. Wife implies a type of relationship that we simply do not have, though I do use it for the sake of accuracy and avoiding hurting feelings.

To be clear I am very happy that we are having a baby. Truly over the moon!

My feelings of joy are somewhat soured by the fact that I FEEL like I was used.

Before my wife decided she wanted a baby she was incredibly ambivalent about sex. The moment she decided she wanted a baby she suddenly wouldn't leave me alone...during her fertile window...outside of that nothing. She hasn't initiated any form of sexualised touching since the instant of conception 2 months ago.

It makes me FEEL used.

I wouldn't really mind except that I also FEEL lied to because she has never wavered on CLAIMING she wants me. By this stage I obviously dismiss these claims out of hand because from MY perspective, they are obviously untrue. Still, it stings to FEEL lied to over and over again by someone who you love.

After we found out she was pregnant she said we can't have sex at all during the pregnancy. That's fine. That's what I expected anyway. She was upset about it but honestly THAT didn't bother me. What bothered me was when she followed it up by demanding that I should /frequently/ ask her for blowjobs. In that moment I wanted to say that she was as high as a kite. I wanted tell her that she is insane if she thinks I will be doing any such thing.

Another instance, I just got out of the shower and was dressed in only jeans and she was making noises about how sexy I looked. Honestly it just caused me pain to hear it. It just sounds like more lies and I don't like it. It makes me FEEL horrible.

I just want her to stop making me FEEL lied to. I just want her to shut up about anything sexual and stop reminding me about the part of our relationship that died long ago, because it FEELS horrible. But right now she is pregnant and I feel like saying ANYTHING to upset her is off the table for the next like...3 years.

I just felt the need to say all that I guess. My plan is to focus on my baby and do my best to ignore this shit.