Dominant or Abusive?

I dunno anymore guys :/, I feel like I just can't have a normal time.

So I started seeing this guy and initially things were light, fun and sexy. We slept together sort of early on and I felt ok with that at the time but now I think we may have got intimate too early. He initially identified himself as top/verse and I just said I was verse but had never topped (I only have a little experience) and he seemed ok with that.

Things progressed and now he's spending a lot of time staying over at mine. The sexual dynamic shaped up quite differently than I anticipated with him wanting me to fuck him most of the time and then do oral. I was really enjoying this and we were bonding but between times he kind of oscillated between being very affectionate and wanting to kiss a lot and being a bit more distant. He is going through some difficult times at the moment so I didn't really take this as a bad thing and put in as much effort as I could to make him feel wanted, showing a lot of affection in and out of the bedroom.

The problems started to rear their head when he started topping me. He's a little rough and I initially though he was playing in very heavily to the dom/sub roleplaying but now I'm not so sure. He hit me a few slaps on the face during and it didn't really bother me but I asked him to chill out. I'm not experienced so I'm not really sure where the line is but anything I wasn't into I would communicate that and to be fair he would listen but would always be pushing me a bit further if I told him not to push my head down during oral he would thrust up etc. One moment he was pushing down on my neck too hard and I moved his arm off because it was uncomfortable and he got a little offended saying that I might learn to like it. It's worth noting that he has also started drinking pretty heavily which I think is exacerbating this.

I haven't spent this much time with a guy ever so I feel like I'm a bit naive but I don't know what to do. I feel so invested in him but one moment he's my loving kissing cuddly little teddy bear and then the next there is a real edge to him that I don't like. My perception of him (obviously I'm not medical professional) is that he might be bipolar or similar although that's not likely grounded in reality.

I had him over on the weekend and I felt genuinely uncomfortable for the first time rather than a little uneasy or anxious. I had a client meeting the next morning so I didn't necessarily want him over but he was having a tough time with his family so convinced me into it. He arrived a bit drunk and brought more with him. He offered me a drink but I wanted to stay fresh for the next morning. I told him before he came that we could cuddle but that was all because it was already pretty late and usually when we have sex there is 2hrs or so between foreplay and switching. At the start of the night he was super sweet, he shared a lot of his struggles from the week and we kissed and cuddled. He said he missed me and was thinking about me holding him all week which really melted my heart. Despite what I said we fooled around a little i sucked him off and we made out more but I had to call it as it was getting late.

During the night he kept pressuring me to fuck him both physically and verbally and I just had to say we need to sleep. I sort of dosed off at one point and woke up to him aggressively stroking my cock trying to get me hard. He was trying to guide me in but I just had to stop him there and tell him to sleep and to be honest his touch was very aggressive and I didn't like it. I rolled over and told him he could be the big spoon if he wanted. He kept pulling at me saying to fuck him then when I was ignoring him started stroking my ass too and I just moved his hand away. Next he was sort of head locking me trying to get me to turn and face him, I was getting short of breath so I pulled his arm away and shunted him to the other side of the bed. I think he got the message and started complaining saying that I disappointed him and what was wrong with people and that he had needs etc. I was pissed off all night and barely slept but the more I though tabout it the more I wondered if there was less of a difference in physical strength between us would he have kept trying. He says he no longer trusts me but I just don't know what to do, he's clearly going through some shit and has struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts in the past. I should probably end things but I keep thinking maybe this is a once off and that I'm partially at fault because I knew he wanted to fuck when I brought him over and I still did it anyway with no intention to do it. So I guess the question is, is this a pattern or a once off am I getting the dominant sexual behaviour muddled up with this other issue.