Aitk for ending up offending my friend?
I (28M) made a couple of new friends recently and invited them for dinner. For context, I live with two flatmates (~25M), and my boyfriend(26M) in the same house. It has been smooth so far living together and we all get along well, but yesterday something happened that killed my mood.
So the new people had come home and I had prepared dinner for them, after which one of my flatmates suggested we play a game in which we ask embarrassing/offensive questions to a person amongst the group, to which they have to answer honestly. Questions like "Who do you think is most likely to end up cheating?", or "Who do you think would end up being in jail", etc. He had already given the disclaimer that the game is such that it is easy to end up offending someone or being offended by someone. There have been little fights amongst people in other past groups during his college time, over taking people's names.
It was just the first round and I got the question, "Who do you think was virgin the longest?". I took my boyfriend's name first because honestly that was the safest but everyone denied saying I can't play it safe.
So next, I took my flatmates name, the one who suggested this game. People asked me to explain, and this is where I think I might be the Kameena:
I told them unnecessary things about him being in a drama group in college and I said it might have taken a while to not end up being a virgin.
In my defence, I was just blabbering bullshit because they wanted an explanation! It was my first time and first round playing this game.
After a few turns we stopped the game to start other games. But I did sense a change in my flatmates mood.
Later when I got 2 minutes alone with him I asked him if everything was alright and he told me, "Aapne naye logon ke saamne beizzati kardi meri, aap aise kaise kar sakte ho?" (You insulted me in front of new people, how could you do that?)
I was shocked because I didn't expect him of all people to take offence because he might have played this game multiple times, and also he was the one who warned about it ending up in fights. And he himself ended up offended over it!
After everyone left, I confronted him and he said the same thing, that I shouldn't have insulted him in front of new people, what they would think of him, and that it wasn't a good thing to do.
He told me I should have taken my own name atleast to save his face. That it's a fun game but it's serious until a few rounds and until people get used to it.
I agreed with him, and apologised to him too, but I also told him that it was him who suggested this game to us and it's not a game to be played with new people. It's my first time playing this game too and he knew the risks of it. I had blabbered some bullshit reasoning during the game but it wasn't to degrade him in any way.
My reasons we're:
If you end up taking offence yourself, don't suggest these games.
No one remembers what I said except you.
Sleep it off and let's talk tomorrow.
I still feel like the asshole because of the things I said unnecessarily, but I was not the reason it happened.
So, AITK?
Edit:
We both talked it out and sorted it out. Both of us apologized, me for saying things unprompted and him for taking it seriously. It's all good now, thanks everyone.