AIO my adult daughter won’t speak to me

My daughter is 26 yo and we have had a bumpy relationship ever since her dad and I divorced four years ago (her dad didn’t want the divorce). For about a year she wouldn’t speak to me. I have since remarried to a man with three kids. Over time my daughter (let’s call her Grace) and I have tentatively rebuilt our relationship. We get together a few times a month, most often just the two of us, but to my joy and relief she also started to come over to our house for family meals occasionally. My new husband is warm and welcoming to her and Grace seems to like his kids, they are younger but they joke around and are friendly. Nothing deep but everyone is cordial. Grace also has a younger brother who is 14. They love each other and he is comfortable with his stepfather and step siblings (50/50 shared custody).

In addition to tensions around family dynamics, Grace and I have repeatedly argued about abortion rights. I am vehemently pro-choice and had a cousin almost die due to an illegal abortion. Grace describes herself as pro-life and has made it clear that she sees my worldview as violent and evil. I have always been pro-choice during her childhood, but her views changed during her teens and college. After several recent heated fights about this topic during the election last fall, I thought we had agreed to disagree and to prioritize our relationship. Seems I was wrong.

At Christmas Grace came over for a family meal. We had a fun brunch. During gift giving, my husband told all the kids that we would like them each to choose a charity for us to make a donation to in their name. That we are very lucky to have so much in life and that we wanted a gift of gratitude and sharing. He asked them to think about it for a few days and let us know their charity.

Each of the kids chose a charity (animal shelter, food bank, river cleanup, etc.). Grace hadn’t named hers and when I called her about it she named an anti-abortion group. I lost my shit and we had a screaming fight. She told me that my values are offensive and unforgivable. I told her that I was angry and hurt she would take what was intended as a kind gesture and use it as a passive/aggressive (or just aggressive?) attack on me and my husband. We haven’t spoken since. I feel certain that this isn’t really about abortion but instead lingering anger over my divorce from her dad and remarrying. We’d probably benefit from joint therapy but at this point I am still so angry I don’t know when I’ll want to try again with her. Am I overreacting?